How to Feel Good in your Clothes

When you are not where you want to be with your body, clothes can be a source of anxiety. If you are carrying a little extra weight it can be hard to source stylish clothes that are affordable.

Equally, if you are very slim, finding clothes that sit right and give you shape can be just as difficult. I’ve compiled a few tips to help your daily dress work with you, not against you.

 

Underwear

It all starts with the essentials; good underwear. Make sure you are wearing the correct size bra. Go for a fitting every 6 months with a professional.  I went to a local lingerie shop for my fitting My Breasts Have Been Measured  Don’t underestimate how much a good bra can affect your shape. It will help all your clothes sit better. If you have big breasts, a well fitted bra will give you much needed support and shape. If you have small breasts you might want to get some padding if that makes you more comfortable.

 

Plan Outfits

Pick out what you are going to wear the night before. Last minute decisions made in a hurry can cause you to throw something on you that you don’t feel great in. A carefully planned ensemble will ensure you feel great all day long.

 

Buy Less, Wear More

The majority of us are not celebs. There is nothing wrong with wearing the same thing over and over. Especially if it’s something you love. Reduce your wardrobe to pieces you adore to wear. We all have that t-shirt that ‘will do us’. Scrap that notion. Love everything you wear and you’ll feel great when you step out the door.

 

Ignore Sizes

I know we need a guideline of where to start and the numbers help, but don’t fret about what size is on the label. I can be anywhere from a size 16 in one store and all the way up to a 24 in others. What matters is that the clothes fit you well. Try on and go with what looks the best as opposed to what number you think you should be.

 

Don’t Follow Trends

If you love what’s trendy and in style of course go for it. Just don’t wear something because everyone else is. Wear what makes you feel happy when you look in the mirror. This takes a certain confidence but you will feel better in a style you prefer over a style you think you should be wearing.

 

Have Fun

Clothes are a necessity of everyday life but don’t let them become a chore. Have fun picking your outfits. Make time to shop so that you don’t get forced into buying something under pressure. The innovation of internet shopping means you can browse and browse until you find something that appeals to you. Make sure your purchase makes you smile even if it makes your credit card cry!

Our clothes should work for us and not against us. Choose wisely and have fun.

Most of all, love your body and stay body positive!

The Irish Don’t Do Compliments

I’ve never really considered myself to be patriotic. I don’t have a great understanding of Irish history. I’m not a native speaker. The game of Hurling and the furore that goes with it, is well over my head. I don’t like spuds nor do I drink tea. Continue reading “The Irish Don’t Do Compliments”

Online Friendships

More and more of our lives are being lived through our screens. Everything happens online now and there is no real escaping it. Like everything in life it should be practised with balance in mind. Personally I’m a fan.

I spend a lot of time online and I love it.

There are times where it can overtake my ‘real’ life but I’m working on that.

What I have realised is that I have many friends that I never see in the flesh. We chat everyday and some of these people know more about me than my family would. Our connection doesn’t need to be cemented in weekly meet ups. I find it strange referring to some of them as friends because not only do I never see them…..I never have!

I’m sure some of you are wondering how you can have a friendship with someone you have never met?

Well don’t knock it till you’ve tried it!

My online mates are the best. I am invested in them. I care about what happens to them but there is a clear divide between the virtual and the reality. My online cohort knows little of my real life friends and visa versa.

There is one huge gaping problem with having a friendship that occurs strictly in the online world. If anything happened to them, no one would think to let you know! I know it’s a very morbid thought to have but it is the truth. I have had this conversation with a close friend and I have actually asked him to tell one person in his real life about me so that if he was ever in trouble or unwell that someone would think to let me know.

I can’t imagine the horror of talking to someone day in day out only for them to fall off the face of the earth and never finding out what happened.

Hopefully it’s not something that will happen to me but it’s a real possibility. I often thought about compiling a little list of people who I’d like to be contacted if anything were to happen to me. After writing this I think I will do just that. If you have loads of online mates, maybe you should too!

Not a Whorehouse

As most of you know I am single. This paired with motherhood has numerous challenges. How do I date while protecting my children? Where do I find someone to date? Where do I find the time to date? Now let’s park those issues to one side and deal with the real problem. The men! Continue reading “Not a Whorehouse”

Memory Lane

Even though I am now a mother to three lovely children I am still my mother’s child. Like all good children do, I like to give my mother a hard time. One of the distinct memories I have of growing up is repeatedly and without mercy giving my mother guff over the fact that she seemed to not remember many details of us as we were growing up. Continue reading “Memory Lane”

Silent Noise

When the house falls silent because it’s child free,
All manner of noises crawl out to haunt me.
There’s a beep that pipes up every 30 seconds or so,
I lay flat eyes opened counting that’s how I know.
The radiator is clicking as the temperature cools, 
Replacing deep child breathe and avoidance of drool.
What I hear so clear and loudest over them all,
Is the silence in each room bathroom,bedrooms and hall.
No crying for mammy to come fix my bed,
Or can I sleep in your room I was good like you said.
Luckily tomorrow the mayhem returns times three,
Then I’ll long for the silence and the noises that haunt me.

My First Internet Rendezvous

I love Valentine’s Day. First to all you non subscribers to the holiday of love….. baaaahhhh to ye. Yes I get that it’s commercialism at its best but sure our whole existence is commercialised. Our education, our health our homes, are all exercises in someone making money somewhere. Valentines is a bit of craic and I love it.

I’ve been single for an age so I haven’t had that someone special to buy something tacky for. Despite my best efforts I have a foot hold on the shelf and the more accustomed I become to the view the less likely it is that I’ll ever leave. That’s alright though, I have more than enough love in my life. Continue reading “My First Internet Rendezvous”

A Letter to an American Mammy

Dear American Mammy,

I feel like I know so much about what life is like in America. Every evening my screen is flooded with portrayals of what it’s like to live in the good old U S of A. From idyllic sitcoms, where everyone is beautiful and successful, to reality tv showcasing teenage mothers who live in the suburbs, we see it all. I do realise that its television but I have more of an understanding of American culture than any other place on earth.

Your children call you Mom, mine call me Mam.  I drive on the left hand side of the road and you drive on the wrong side! I’m not quite sure what a skillet is but I’m pretty sure that I have one I just call it something else. My daughter has a fringe and your daughter has bangs. We don’t have such a thing as a carpool lane and I don’t know what Twinkies are but I really want one!

I think if you were to sit opposite me and we were to chat over a cup of tea you’d tell me that it’s not very accurate. That everything is a little exaggerated for the entertainment of the masses and that our lives are not much different. We are neighbours separated by an ocean but in many ways life is the same for us all.

We get up each day and do our best for your children.

There is one distinction between you and me. I will never know the fear of sending my children to school to wonder if they will return home safe? I worry that they won’t work hard that they might not finish their lunch but it has never once crossed my mind that they won’t come back home once that school bell rings. I cannot imagine and if I’m honest I don’t really want to.

Since the beginning of 2018 there have been 3 shootings a week in schools in the United States of America. The fear of sending your children to school and something fatal happening to them is not that of irrational nightmares. It’s a very distinct possibility.

I read this week a circular that came home from a school in your country advising children to run in a zig zag line to minimise the chances of being shot. I can’t even digest that sentence:

run in a zig zag pattern to avoid being shot.

Children are equipped with vocabulary like lock-down, Kevlar and code red as if it’s the most normal thing in the world. It is not normal. It is not right.

This cannot be the norm for your children. Now is the time to put an end to this. An outdated aspect of the law cannot and must not overrule the lives of innocent children. Whatever you decide to do to take a stand know that every mother is the world is right behind you. I hope the next time I write it will be to congratulate you on change.

Until then stay safe,

An Irish Mammy.

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