If you were to meet my sister and me you’d be hard pushed to think we were sisters. We are polar opposites in so many ways. I’m an extrovert. She’s an introvert. I take a drink from time to time. She’s a pioneer. I couldn’t live without my makeup. She wears none. I love the opposite sex. For her they are more trouble than they are worth.
There are some things we have in common. We both love Sci-Fi movies and crafting. We both spent too much time growing up playing video games.
Most importantly we share a love for my children.
Now you might think that goes without saying that an aunt loves her niece and nephews. What I experience on a daily basis is more than that.
I often get people asking how I cope as a single mother of three? I have huge supports and Jacqueline’s support is unquantifiable. She minds them when I need to attend my course. She brings them to appointments that I can’t make. She does homework with Finn every evening and cooks them their evening meal. She’ll babysit if I want to go somewhere and would never let me down.
She not only minds them, she teaches them.
She’s instilling in them manners, responsibility and accountability. All of which are forgotten the minute I arrive but I know it will stand to them as they grow older. I also know because she doesn’t buy their love or barter for it with television programmes and days out that the wonderful relationships they have will last into adult hood.
It’s my sister’s birthday today and presents seem worthless in comparison to all she does for me. We are not overly affectionate with one another and when I say nice things she wonders what I’m looking for. I’m not looking for anything today. I just want to let her know how amazing she is and how much I love her.
When I had my first child I was threatened by other people’s love for my child.
I was so desperate to have him love me more than anyone else that if he showed affection for another adult I was sad. As if it meant that he’d love me a little less. As you settle into motherhood and you are three deep you realise they will never love anyone as much as you.
One day sitting at the table with my mother. We were going through relationships with the children. Who is Nanny’s brother? Who are Granddad’s children? I think the question that I asked was and who are my children? Finn answered ‘We are!!!’ and quickly added. ‘We are Jacqueline’s children too!!!’ I looked at my mother and I thought my heart would burst with happiness.
I answered ‘Ye sure are her children’
She may not be a mother by title but she’s as good as.
So Happy Birthday Jack… from your grateful and loving sister and our children, Kyle, Finn and Macy.